>>4002
Right... So if I die first, then how will you benefit from watching or "waych"ing me? *jerk off hand motion into a 'this fucking guy' point*

>>3999
US Army MRE, bought from an army surplus store. Menu 2, Pork ribs. They say MREs are shit, but I thought it was really good and I wasn't even that hungry. The sauce on the ribs were good and the bacon&potato soup was also delicious.

>>4009
Hey, fair enough man. I think what bothers me about the taste is how i has that over all lack of vibrancy that cooks/chefs call "dead food". Like if a server doesn't take food that's been sitting in the window between the kitchen and the pick up area for a while, they cause a ruckus because the food is "dieing". It means that the food is not going to be taken in as it's meant to be enjoyed from it's exposure to the world (cold air and so on). Now that's what is wrong with these M.R.E.s in general, they are more preservative and packaging than food and it's like saying a Hungryman microwavable meal isn't bad. No, it's not "bad" but should you be eating them as part of your regular diet? The answer is clear that they aren't bad to pepper in from time to time and I think you are trying to emphasize they are receiving a bad wrap when the one you had was tasty to you, it doesn't mean I hate them but I do think of them as a signal to utilize different tactics if I'm eating more than one a day. Also given that their packaging is very harmful to the environment, I don't condone eating them unless you have to and then burning the films and plastic/metal wrappings that will lead to being able to be tracked and so on. If you burn the unusable parts (like some of them have a metal portion container that can be used to drink from or so on so saving that is light and junk that can be turned into treasure) and only keep the parts you can use, you lesson the impact and of course do not as easily reveal your patterns, how and what you are doing, and locations/paths.

>>4010
insightful advice. Thanks man

Hey, so many of you may recall that I am proficient in many forms of fighting and tactical arts and have had several weapons choice threads. I've brought up things like a grocery carts, or a lasso, or whip for use for incapacitating them and stopping them from being as directly dangerous. I am starting to look into boomerangs as an option and wanted to post of that but also get ideas flowing again while at it. So post away with your thoughts!

sure is troll in here

Speaking as someone who will inevitably become a zombie, I feel the need to berate you for your 2% target because overly lean meat is just a pain in the ass to chew on and isn't nearly as tasty as meat with a little marbling going on.

All you survivors and your "me, me, me" approach. Think about the zombies you have to feed for once.

>>4037
Or I could just punch you to death now and save us both some hassle...

>>4052
not gonna be much of a survivor when you're trapped in prison bro

>>4037
An inelegant solution, but a solution nonetheless, I suppose. However that does not change the fact that you won't taste very good. I would suggest carrying a bottle of Worcester sauce in your bug out bag.

Even if it does not benefit me, I'm still thinking about other victims of zombification. I'm magnanimous that way.

I hope that picture isn't really you

Caz you look like a FAG

>>4054
Yeah... Or maybe it's all part of my plan! Dork Patrol in full effect.
>>4057
Hrrmmmm
>>4058
>>4059
It's me being all fucking man all the fucking time, yeah be jealous... My gay dink getting slathered with cunt while yours; not so much. Living the dream, brah.

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>Ask me whatever you want and it will be answered by an expert.

what sort of technique and training regimen would you use to to reach the goal of deepthroating a 10" cock.

>>4092
What always happens when someone can not muster an appropriate construct of opinion or question; name calling and/or insinuation mixed with dumb... Good ol' fashion dumb. There's not really a regiment I'm aware of for this but I'm sure you're well on your way to taking every inch your mouth comes into contact with, handsome.

Sergeant+Bruce+Willis= FAGGOT

How are you going about to get down to 2% body fat? Thats a really damn low percentage..Thats actually in the 'world'-class bodybuilder range (anything below 10%)

What im wondering is, what are you an expert in? (That will dictate what questions I ask you. Ofc there's always the pitfall of asking an 'internet expert' so I'll have to take your words at face value)

>>4097
Trying to find a logical pattern in an illogical statement like asking me to defend my opinion rather than just having them. What makes me a faggot and you not? Yeah, just fight with yourself to type some bullshit out in reply to that while the grown ups are typing.
>>4098
Answers to everything in this thread have been typed out already. I've posted for years and proven every claim I've made of my self so after going through these posts, go ahead and ask away. It's not like my reposting my expertise will make anything I type anything more or less valid when I answer.

No hostility ment..I didn't read through the thread before I posted (violated lurkmoar didn't I?)

i have Questions about what exercises you're using in what form. Also nutrition, feeding your body (in terms of protein, carbs, calories, fats and sugars in a numbered amount. Not necessarily what you're eating, but what you're getting from it.

I recently ramped up my weightlifting/strength training regiment. I inadvertently did weight lifting for 3 hours across my entire body, when I got home I put about 80G protein in my body and ate two banana's the next day the only amount of soreness I got was in my upper pecks and teres major/minor. Despite having lifted well outside my established weight limits also somehow pushed myself to do anywhere from 3-10 sets of 8-'as many as I can muster' reps depending on what I was working out. In two days I made a measurement and noticed a 1/3 inch gain on my left upper arm (weaker/smaller arm), the size of my right lower arm now matches my lower left arm(as does the upper right). I can see added definition in my shoulder muscles, my lats are considerably bigger (actually noticeable), and my left leg is now, just a few millimeters smaller than my right leg (kicking/push off leg for jumping and running).

I saw as much growth in one 3-hour session as I did in 21, 30 minute workouts I did in the course of a month.

Is there any long term problem to this? Or would it actually be okay to do workouts like this? Also could you agree/believe that working to decrease the time it takes you to do a set amount of reps per set will create fast, strong and more compact(smaller, but denser) muscles?

Sorry for typing so much but you're a person that has exercised for functional strength, I to am doing the same thing. Also what are your thoughts on extended isometric exercises (going beyond just the 12 seconds, but doing the flex as hard as you can for as long as you can)

You look like Mal Reynolds from Firefly. But you also sound a little crazy, so, you know... I wouldn't follow you, best survivalist, or not, you don't speak well like a natural leader should.

>>4103
I have got to stop posting after booze but I'm happy it was readable this time...
>>4105
No worries, man and well articulated questions that are nicely layered! I'll be posting a reply with detail shortly in a few days as I will be away training for about three days (on my way tomorrow night).
>>4108
Fair enough but I will ask if you've actually HEARD me speak? It's hypnotic and often one of my better talents. When I type here it's sometimes for effect or character but it's also usually in a more extremist tone as I do conduct myself that way often. However, I also have many friends and people that almost count on me being that; my obsessive compulsive behaviors and such being turned into positives rather then negatives. I don't type this in retort of your post rather than ask that you remember that you are only dealing with facets of me here and that you scale your thoughts accordingly as I often do.

>>4105
For ease of reading I'll label each divided group in alpha so that I can better allow the answers to be cohesive while not mixing completely...

a-
No worries, violating lurkmore is only shitty if you react like an asshole on being called out on it. You didn't so you're alright with me.
b-
I've made my own TRX suspension system and I do a smattering of training on it but almost countless pullups (in almost every position I can think of because position matters and makes more of the muscle group work), a ton of cardiovascular training but all very specific and all in a structure that gives my body regiment with out plateau. Here are some links that I modify but use for some elements of my training.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9mjkrTIsOq4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtKSYFlpoTM

I currently do 2 to 5 hours a day and will be at about eight in four months for four months with about five rest days each month. I am currently vegetarian but will be back to vegan by the 15th of January. Lots of juices made from good to great produce and soups along with lots of water and things like coconut and avocado, when I'm vegan.

The rest get lumped together with c;
c-
Post an image of yourself and with it give the most accurate and honest length of your day to day you can, or if you'd rather not, I'll set up an email for you to send it to me personally BUT even if I'm spot on in most ways I'll be giving you a personal assessment online... Personal knowledge of yourself over time is pretty much the best way of getting this all answered but I'm proud of you for asking someone and your being so straight forward with it and there is never harm done in asking as much as how it's asked. You have questions and you are seeking answers in a way I respect so keep them up and I'll be happy to do what i can. This goes for all that read this! Further, isometrics are in how you define them, I feel the time is a construct of example more than an exact rule; much like the number on a scale representing versus exacting. I'll post more on this soon and I'm back to work but I'll be back soonish.

What the fuck have you done today?

>>4170
What I haven't done is post on an anonymous internet message board about how I'm a hardman vegan bodybuilder with expert knowledge in surviving imaginary zombie apocalypse scenarios and come across as a slightly psychopathic asshole who just might become another American tragedy when a little school kid shouts out "Fag" because I'm fighting imaginary zombies so I take that Assault rifle and obsessive paranoia to the nearest school and shoot the kids who might be zombies.

>>4171
Sure you haven't...

>>4170
Making zombie porn.

>>4174
Gross... Enjoy that, I guess. SO I'm still pounding away at it on my end and I'm wondering how all those here are doing in terms of getting in shape and getting better at fighting, tactics, survival and so on. Let's ring some bells.

Alright gang, a few quick things. I'm not sure why this board has been moving this slow but it has been and I don't personally feel the subject's been exhausted or simplified; I just don't. SO let's bring it and I offer my thread to be utilized to express more than it's subject, flaming included.

Now in personal news, have not been training or vegan for a couple months now and am starting back up the fifteenth of February. I'm up about 14 pounds of chub and some of it is muscle but not even a third. I'll be posting about getting back on track and being there as I do so and I invite anyone else that sees this to do the same!

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m/27/6'/180lbs/white/born and raised in tx. I am by no means a fat fuck, but I havent trained physically since I was 22. As such, I am by no means a front-liner. As a soloist I would have to rely more on stealth, wit, and terrain advantage. I keep making token gestures to stay healthy and get fit, but for the most part I know my intellect, skills, and preparations are my only saving grace.

I have been a medical technician of various sorts for the vast majority of my late-teenage/adulthood. My fields have been direct care (home health for the elderly and group-homes for the retarded/crazy), nursing (dropped out of the RN program), and I just completed a program for pharmacy technician. Generally speaking, I am the group medic. I plan on finishing my associates and applying to the UNT pharmacist program. If at that point there has yet to be an apocalyptic situation, I will consider taking EMT courses just for the hell of it.

As a texas native, I endure a harsh climate and highly conservative/rigid social norms. The area of my descent was well populated (large city plus surrounding country, 150K+ residents) though very rural and undeveloped. Subsequently, I am the progeny of an assorted lot of country bumpkins and backwoods hillbillies. They are rugged folk that love only 3 things beyond church and family: Fox news, BBQ, and prepping for the eventual collapse of American civilization. Even after forsaking most of their culture, I still found myself drawn to the notion of self-preservation, primitive living, and wilderness survival. Ive studies a shit ton of all that in an "academic" sense, and practiced maybe a tenth of it all on regular trips to the river beds, mountains, or isolated farmland (~2x a year my crew takes a trip overnight).

As a side-bar, I reiterate that my intellect is a saving grace. I don't often toot my own horn, but this is the fucking internet so hey, why not. Like many of the folks drawn to secluded socialization on the internet, such as this, I am of above average intelligence, especially in comparison to the company I keep in my day to day life. I relish opportunities to chat with my professors or senior officials at work; they are often the only course of intellectual stimulation I get outside of my course work and studies. Hopefully it will all be worth something when the shit hits the fan.

>>4199
This has to be the 'best' over all reply I've ever seen; very well articulated while concise and conservative in it's over all approach. From this post I feel what you express to be seemingly accurate. What I would like to know is what you are doing to refine your fitness now (if anything, I mean there wasn't really an implication either way but I'm guessing you plan on doing so possibly) and if you train in any way that would be merited by your peers as 'extreme' (in terms of survival in general)? Of course this is not to type that you have to, to be considered ready as much as I am simply interested in your opinions and what you personally do beyond what you've typed. Thanks for the great post, either way.

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>>4201

In terms of physicality, which seems to be the preoccupation of the conversation, I'll put my current state to you like this:

>Strength: 3/10
>Dexterity: 3/10
>Constitution: 2/10
>Intelligence: 5/10
>Charisma: 5/10
>Wisdom: 4/10

In years past the physical stats were higher and the mental stats lower...you can see how that's almost the natural progression of things. I've always had a fast (if not turbulent) metabolism. (Since we're being candid, I'll sidebar that the turbulent comment is a humorous poke at the fact I have an irritable bowel. Another important sidebar note is that I have asthma. Its like 5/10, could be worse but still gets the better of me pretty quick.

For most of my life my default weight has been 165lbs. I am tall and lean by default and as such my target weight during my prime years of athletic training was 180lbs. I am currently at my "target" weight, except that its all fat and not muscle. I realize there is so much more to the complexity of human anatomy and physical fitness, but the weight factors help spell it out. The side effect of my getting squishy is that my stamina (constitution) is suffering and I find myself fatigued easily. Also, my strength has regressed just a bit into what I would consider unacceptable or sub-par. My agility (dexterity) is also regressed a bit, though I don't find this to impact my daily life as much. I also smoke waaay too much weed, so my wisdom score is probably suffering a "chronic" -2 penalty.

My plans for this year are to begin the slow climb back up to a healthy body. I started several months back just forcing myself to be less sedentary. I get up and move around more, stand instead of sitting when the option arises, and take the longest route anywhere I have to walk. Now I've begun slapping the snooze on my alarm one less time in the morning and use that small bit of extra time to so some basic stretching. Soon I'll begin some cardio routines a few times a week like a short jog around the block (with ankle weights). I also have a few weights laying in the garage still that I will begin throwing around.

>>4198
It's likely related to back when boards were being mashed together. I noticed a lot of people just bailed when /zom/ was merged into /x/ and haven't bothered coming back. Maybe they found a new board, or maybe they just took the merger as a sign to move on from repeating the same old topic every day.

>>4206
Fair enough, hombre.
So let's get on track?

>>4206
Maybe they just got tired of SBW's bullshit

>>4386
Oh the butt-hurt is strong with this one.

He is obviously deluded. 3rd post says his body fat is at 2%. Professional triathletes normally have around 3~6% body fat and if you do a quick search, they all look lean and mean. Based on your face pic, I'd say you have about >15% body fat.
So let me say it again. You are obviously deluded.

>>4440
Learn to understand what you read, fella.
I have never posted my body fat percentage as being where my goal is and you are fighting to fight instead of just breathing calmly and understanding there is no fight here beyond the one in your head. Even now, choke back the urge of saying to yourself that you are breathing calmly and take some personal responsibility for the problems you have to over come and just over come them so you don't have to spend your time wasting it with proving, because you won't here. If there's one consistent thing I do here and have for years; it's post with accountability and no matter what typo or mistake I make, I always make sure my point is made of honesty, honestly. If your goal is to disprove me by pointing out the flaws in my method, you have an uphill battle ahead that you will likely not win.

Still deluded bro.

>>4448
In what way, homie? Call me out on something real or keep lookin' a fool and shit.

>>4449
That's what I thought...

Well anyway, I have gained almost twenty pounds from the beginning of this thread and have not done nearly any of my survival training or even very much fight training in six months. I'm not done with it or anything but I live in a world where it's not necessary right now nor what I need to focus my efforts on. Five of the pounds are rock hard, impressive muscle while the other fifteen are gut and titty. I know, hot. This rest of the year is all fitness and personal and spiritual enlightenment/becoming the best me I can be. I've been working on growing stronger and healthier plants and I haven't been vegan in nearly six months as I have grown very happy with my very omnivorous girlfriend. So beyond that; as I start a new battery of fitness and not really on being specifically "zombie ready" as much as more "anything ready", I am considering starting a new thread on fitness readiness for survival and wondering if I should let this thread dwindle away. Look, I mean very little real questions have been asked here and the few that are asked are not long lasting or replied to after clarification. My girlfriend tells me that people probably look at this as escape, like reading a science fiction book or comic and I can intellectualize that. I am having trouble getting why anyone would fixate very real time toward very unreal ideology WHILE presenting their ideas and platitudes of conduct and such as the best and brightest AND being "the real deal". It's like the people that say all the survivors of zombie movies are dumb, ARE the very people that would be groaned at for being dumb zombie movie survivors. Let's be smarter and real if we're going to be or at least maybe in this thread or my next. Please, I welcome anything here because it all connects if you can see how. Death to the Dead.

My roommate just told me his "If zombies happen" plan and man, it doesn't shock me but it sometimes surprises me to have someone's plan unfold and they not see the flaws in it. I told him the vehicle I would choose and the place I would take over as my fortification. He thought it was good but he had much different plans.
So I want to ask, what is the spectrum of YOUR plans? Not just your bestie but what would you do one one end of the spectrum and the other end? DO YOU have a back up and what is it?

What would you do if you met me in real life?

I hear zombies love to eat bodyfat

you could have a lipovore procedure

>>4793
Whatevs.

Hey, I'm not going to jump to any conclusions yet. But I want more details on your training/diet schedule you've set out for yourself during your training period and why. I will give you a little background on me. Male 26yrs old. Been in the military for over 9 years. Army. Originally Air Assault Infantry then Combat Medic then Radio, Satellite and Computer Communications and I've had the pleasure of working and learning aside Psychological Operations, Navy Seals, Snipers, Generator and Auto Mechanics. I decided I was going to learn as much from the Military as I could for unforeseen survival purposes. Outside of the military I am a licensed Paramedic, with degrees in I.T. and Business Management<--Don't ask got bored. And I am a Bladesmith. I have trained in martial arts since I was 6 went golden gloves in boxing, second degree black belt in Taekwondo a black belt in Karate and then I went to MMA where I learned mainly Muay Thai, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and Judo. I have several friends in the medical profession including a Nutritionist, Sports Therapists, Two Surgeons and the a personal trainer<-- kinda sorta medical. In my free time I do enjoy Urban Exploring and varied sports from rock climbing, scuba diving and even parkour/free running. I am one of the very very lucky few that not only has been able to train myself to extreme measures but have gotten to experience some real shit (two tours in Iraq accumulating just shy of 3 years over seas). Now not many people have had the chances I have to accumulate such a variety of real world training and experience. And I want to point out to EVERYONE that every single human is different... yeah for the most part we are alike and in general react the same way to disease, dehydration, exhaustion, starvation etc. But all handle it differently to one degree or another. So I want to know what you have laid for a training/diet schedule and why. In regards specifically to training yourself. What are your specific goals you are trying to accomplish with said diet/training.

>>4927
I haven't been training in almost a year now; at least not how I was but I plan on going back to it this coming year. Honestly, one of the biggest reasons I'll admit right now is I wanted to be at 2-4% functionally to win American Ninja Warrior. A possibly daft goal to others but one I feel I can make happen. I want this and have other goals but one of those other goals was to be the best me I could be. That definition has changed over this last year in some regards but not completely. Your training is fantastic if it's everything you typed so I want to answer at length. I'll post again later tonight after compiling the information for you and thank you for your detailed opinion and listing of your training.

>>3801
I think its really cool to see someone with downs syndrome working so hard to get active whilst taking on a hobby. I salute you friend.

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>>3801

>>5370
I know; I'm a champion. It's so cool that you can admit your jealousy like that over my excellence and how much better I am than you.