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I'll keep it real with you Anon.
(Disclaimer, I am talking about injecting heroin, although this will sort of apply to just snorting or taking pills, it just takes longer to become dependent on it when not injecting.)
It's AMAZING....at first.
The first time you do it, you'll get an amazing rush of euphoria all through your body. You'll think it's the most amazing feeling ever, and it very well may be.
So then you'll want to keep doing it, and you will. For about a week it'll just be amazing and you won't think there are any negative side effects. You'll just keep buying more and injecting more because you just can't wait to feel that euphoria again.
Next, one of two things will happen. You'll either tell yourself that you are going to take a break for a couple days, or you'll have blown through all your money and be broke. Either way, you'll go to sleep that night high and feeling amazing. Then the next morning you'll wake up and just feel like shit. (For me, my back hurts SO bad, my legs will shake, impossible to keep them still, and I will have hot and cold chills accompanied by cold sweats. Others I've known will just keep puking and have diarrhea.) So now if you just told yourself that you were going to quit and still have money, you're in luck, cause now you're on your way to get some more to get yourself "well" and out of withdrawal. However, if you already blew through all your money, and you're dopesick and broke, then you will be thinking of ANYTHING to get money. Personally, when I was really bad in my addiction, I stole over 4000$ from my grandparents not to mention all the tools I took and pawned off. (Also let's not forget to mention due to my addiction with heroin I now have 3 felonies.)
Now when I say you'll do anything to get money to get out of withdrawal, I know exactly what you're thinking, "I would NEVER do anything like that for drugs, I could just tough through the withdrawal then I wouldn't get dependent again." Yea, I said the exact same thing before I robbed people and stole from my family to get more dope.
So now it's a few months later, you've probably lost your job and now you're dependent on heroin very bad. Pretty much ALL the money you ever get goes towards getting more dope and you're doing things you thought you'd never do to get that money. So now you go over to your mom's house dope sick with the sole intention of getting money from her, either by her giving it to you due to some lie you thought up or by stealing it. She secretly knows you're on heroin but doesn't want to believe it herself so she believes you when you say that you just have a cold. She offers you some chicken noodle soup, but since you're dope sick your stomach is flipping all sorts of ways and there's no way you're gonna eat it so you respectfully decline. You come up with some bullshit lie to ask for money and since she in the back of her mind truly knows what you want it for, she comes up with a reason she can't give you any right now. So now you're just sitting in the livingroom with her, and the temp is a comfortable 68 degrees, but you're still alternating between being so cold you're shivering and so hot you feel like you need to take your clothes off. Sweating the whole time, even during the cold spells. Don't forget your back is killing you and your legs won't sit still to save your life. After 20 minutes of this agony, you finally get your chance, your mom leaves to go to the bathroom, and the second the door shuts, you're up and digging through her purse. You find 18$ and take it all. So as not to be suspicious, you wait until she finishes in the bathroom, even though you want to leave right this second. As soon as she returns, you come up with some other lie about something you have to do and jet out the door and start heading straight to the city, or wherever it is you get your dope. (Personally I live in a rural area so I had to drive to a nearby city, about 30 mins away. And let me tell you, those 30 min drives were terrible, however when I was dope sick really bad, I'd turn that 30 minute drive into a 15 minute drive.) So anyway, you get about halfway to the dopeman, and then your mom calls you, you already know why she's calling, but you don't want to face the fact that you just stole from your mom so you just ignore the call, you'll make up a lie as to why you couldn't answer later after you get well.
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