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Dear John,
I routinely eat in bed, even things like toast, crackers, and uncooked ramen. I frequently spill things or touch the sheets with my greasy fingers, and and also cough and sneeze into the sheets. I drool, sweat and shed all over everything, especially the pillows. Sometimes I even bleed, or can't quite hold down my puke and cup it into the comforter so it doesn't soak the mattress.
But you know what? I just shake all that on to the floor because God gave us washing machines to take care of the rest. And God gave us brooms, mops, and vacuum cleaners to deal with the floors.
God even gave us Zep brand Industrial Purple to clean finger smudges off of light switches, gummy gross off cabling and buttons, and accumulated palm grease off the corners of the walls. You can never end spills and crumbs, but you can always make short work of managing them.
Yours,
John